The human database christened the brain amazes me to the limit. It's idiotically funny how I tend to forget a lot of things but some past impressions are so deeply engraved that the visualizations appear in a crystal clear picture, just the way they happened years ago.
My grandfather (mom's dad) expired when I was upgraded to the 8th standard. I was there in kolkata then and had to extend my usual summer holidays by 2 weeks due to the incident. If most of you remember, 8th standard is when you get to choose between your alternate language in school. Some have an option between Marathi and Sanskrit, and others have French added to this list. We had to opt between Marathi and Sanskrit, the latter being more popular as you could score maximum marks since it was an extremely rattofyable subject.
My being away when school reopened didn't allow me to choose and I was put in the Marathi class, which I somehow felt happy about then and now too.
Our class, in general had also got reshuffled. So the day I entered, I saw some pretty new faces. Some, I knew because we used to meet them on the football ground and had many matches and fights in common. Very soon, I understood that I had moved from one blacklisted class to another one, the magnitude of blackness yet to be measured.
Apart from the new faces, also were friends who were carried forward with me together. Among them was Sonia, one of my very good friends. It so happened that a seat was reserved for me, 2nd last row to the left from the door, 2nd last seat in that row. Quite unrealistic seat for me since I was relatively short then (not that I am extremely tall now). Sonia was seated behind me, the last seat verily assigned to her since she was and still is very near to a 'she giraffe'.
In 15 minutes, she introduced me to the entire class, not literally though!! Ye class D me thi, arre usko pehchaana kya, wo kaafi intelligent hai, isko kuch nahi aata, ye bahut baat karti hai, she has become my good friend...traits were defined and distributed unevenly. I said hello to them in my mind.
The bell rang. Geography text books came out of each bag. If you remember, we had those long and wide geography text books then which refused to fit in our bags.
"Good morning maaam" half standing, half sitting everybody chorused.
"Good morning", round faced, airy attitude, hugging books, chalks in hand, a roundly round bindi, slightly crumpled off white sari, crimson bordered, historically walked in Mrs. Geography (control, control, no names)
"Ye kaun hai", I whispered, talking backwards, looking forwards.
"Mrs. Geography", Sonia answered, "Thodi strict hai, lekin she teaches well"
"Hmmmmm", I said.
As the screeching chalk attacked the childly eardrums and while planets were statically revolving round on the chalkboard universe, Sonia tapped me on the back.
"Woh dekh"
"Kya", I tried to see what she was seeing.
"Udhar, 1st bench pe", she secretly smiled.
"Abe woh to so raha hai"
As we were trying very hard to suppress our tickling stomachs to tickle our esophagus, bending forward, hiding our faces to hide our smirks, we didn't notice the stopping of the chalk screeches. Only when a few innocent (oh come on, not so innocent) heads turned with gesturing eyes claiming us as guilty, did we understand that the geographical universe had closed down on us and somehow a horizontal gravity pulled our faces to face Mrs. Geography as she bore her not so chilly, yet chilly gaze into us.
"STAND UP!!” the lioness roared "What’s so funny?"
Trembling legs, weak knees attempted to stand, stood. "Nothing Mam"
"So you were smiling, laughing for nothing?" sarcasm spoke.
Fortunately or unfortunately the tall Sonia hid behind me.
"Ok out with it, why were you laughing?"
"Nothing Mam...I.err...nothing mam", my vocabulary got restricted.
"Tell me the reason, else I will not continue with the class", she thundered.
Pairs of eyes followed the invisible tennis ball between Mrs. Geography and me. Necks turned this way and then that way.
Silence prevailed indefinitely for a few minutes. My shoes, my canvases were never zoomed in as minutely as they were that very day.
"I am still waiting...the whole class is suffering because of you. LOOK UP, what are you looking down for? Come on, quick, out with it..."
I dared to look up "Maam, actually...."
"Yes I'm, we are listening", she said
"Maam, actually.....Pawas...he he ha ha ha ha", I unknowingly burst out laughing.
Shocked pairs of eyes penetrated me.
"Maam, Pawas was...he he he hey hey hey haa ha ha...” uncontrollably, I burst into fits of laughter.
Mrs. Geography couldn’t believe what was happening, but she stood silently, her raging eyes doing the speaking.
"He he ha ha ha hoo hoo" I was unstoppable and so was the class by now.
"He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha"
"He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
The whole class was in splits, in fits. This was getting too much for Mrs. Geography though she was also trying very hard to resist bursting into laughter.
"ENOUGH" she roared "THAT’S ENOUGH. Either you tell me the reason, and now it rather be a good one or I'll throw you out of the class and never take you in. This is the first class of mine you are attending and this is how you behave."
Her words didn't matter anymore, nor did the brutal consequence as I had no hold over myself now.
"Maam, maaam...he he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he"
Finally the lost words found me.
"Maam, actually Pawaskar was sleeping....He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
"He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
"He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
"Haa haa ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
The whole class including Mrs. Geography went berserk.
After some time when we couldn’t laugh anymore and found our voices back, Mrs. Geography spoke, boring her eyes on the now very much awake Pawaskar.
"Well it's Pawaskar who is to blame then...." she smiled "Sit down"
My grandfather (mom's dad) expired when I was upgraded to the 8th standard. I was there in kolkata then and had to extend my usual summer holidays by 2 weeks due to the incident. If most of you remember, 8th standard is when you get to choose between your alternate language in school. Some have an option between Marathi and Sanskrit, and others have French added to this list. We had to opt between Marathi and Sanskrit, the latter being more popular as you could score maximum marks since it was an extremely rattofyable subject.
My being away when school reopened didn't allow me to choose and I was put in the Marathi class, which I somehow felt happy about then and now too.
Our class, in general had also got reshuffled. So the day I entered, I saw some pretty new faces. Some, I knew because we used to meet them on the football ground and had many matches and fights in common. Very soon, I understood that I had moved from one blacklisted class to another one, the magnitude of blackness yet to be measured.
Apart from the new faces, also were friends who were carried forward with me together. Among them was Sonia, one of my very good friends. It so happened that a seat was reserved for me, 2nd last row to the left from the door, 2nd last seat in that row. Quite unrealistic seat for me since I was relatively short then (not that I am extremely tall now). Sonia was seated behind me, the last seat verily assigned to her since she was and still is very near to a 'she giraffe'.
In 15 minutes, she introduced me to the entire class, not literally though!! Ye class D me thi, arre usko pehchaana kya, wo kaafi intelligent hai, isko kuch nahi aata, ye bahut baat karti hai, she has become my good friend...traits were defined and distributed unevenly. I said hello to them in my mind.
The bell rang. Geography text books came out of each bag. If you remember, we had those long and wide geography text books then which refused to fit in our bags.
"Good morning maaam" half standing, half sitting everybody chorused.
"Good morning", round faced, airy attitude, hugging books, chalks in hand, a roundly round bindi, slightly crumpled off white sari, crimson bordered, historically walked in Mrs. Geography (control, control, no names)
"Ye kaun hai", I whispered, talking backwards, looking forwards.
"Mrs. Geography", Sonia answered, "Thodi strict hai, lekin she teaches well"
"Hmmmmm", I said.
As the screeching chalk attacked the childly eardrums and while planets were statically revolving round on the chalkboard universe, Sonia tapped me on the back.
"Woh dekh"
"Kya", I tried to see what she was seeing.
"Udhar, 1st bench pe", she secretly smiled.
"Abe woh to so raha hai"
As we were trying very hard to suppress our tickling stomachs to tickle our esophagus, bending forward, hiding our faces to hide our smirks, we didn't notice the stopping of the chalk screeches. Only when a few innocent (oh come on, not so innocent) heads turned with gesturing eyes claiming us as guilty, did we understand that the geographical universe had closed down on us and somehow a horizontal gravity pulled our faces to face Mrs. Geography as she bore her not so chilly, yet chilly gaze into us.
"STAND UP!!” the lioness roared "What’s so funny?"
Trembling legs, weak knees attempted to stand, stood. "Nothing Mam"
"So you were smiling, laughing for nothing?" sarcasm spoke.
Fortunately or unfortunately the tall Sonia hid behind me.
"Ok out with it, why were you laughing?"
"Nothing Mam...I.err...nothing mam", my vocabulary got restricted.
"Tell me the reason, else I will not continue with the class", she thundered.
Pairs of eyes followed the invisible tennis ball between Mrs. Geography and me. Necks turned this way and then that way.
Silence prevailed indefinitely for a few minutes. My shoes, my canvases were never zoomed in as minutely as they were that very day.
"I am still waiting...the whole class is suffering because of you. LOOK UP, what are you looking down for? Come on, quick, out with it..."
I dared to look up "Maam, actually...."
"Yes I'm, we are listening", she said
"Maam, actually.....Pawas...he he ha ha ha ha", I unknowingly burst out laughing.
Shocked pairs of eyes penetrated me.
"Maam, Pawas was...he he he hey hey hey haa ha ha...” uncontrollably, I burst into fits of laughter.
Mrs. Geography couldn’t believe what was happening, but she stood silently, her raging eyes doing the speaking.
"He he ha ha ha hoo hoo" I was unstoppable and so was the class by now.
"He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha"
"He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
The whole class was in splits, in fits. This was getting too much for Mrs. Geography though she was also trying very hard to resist bursting into laughter.
"ENOUGH" she roared "THAT’S ENOUGH. Either you tell me the reason, and now it rather be a good one or I'll throw you out of the class and never take you in. This is the first class of mine you are attending and this is how you behave."
Her words didn't matter anymore, nor did the brutal consequence as I had no hold over myself now.
"Maam, maaam...he he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he"
Finally the lost words found me.
"Maam, actually Pawaskar was sleeping....He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
"He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
"He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
"Haa haa ha ha ha He he ha ha ha He he ha ha ha hoo hoo hoo"
The whole class including Mrs. Geography went berserk.
After some time when we couldn’t laugh anymore and found our voices back, Mrs. Geography spoke, boring her eyes on the now very much awake Pawaskar.
"Well it's Pawaskar who is to blame then...." she smiled "Sit down"
Pawaskar and I were good friends later!!!
4 comments:
Nice post dude... I remember being Pawas on lot of occasions in my school days... Even now in boring office meetings I hardly keep myself awake...
Hi!
I agree with Amrita
takes one straight back to the days when we would also be sitting on school benches trying to hide our faces behind text books so that the teacher cannot see that she has successfully put us to sleep with her theories...
You've written it so wonderfully.
BTW, I had a friend with Last Name as Pawaskar :) We are still friends but her Last Name has changed now!
GBU
Arti
Thanks Amy, dust, Arti...it actually was very funny when it happened!!
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